Calvin Asher

10 July 1994 - 20 June 2011
Bassist and backup vocal for Above the Tragedy
Height: 169cm | Weight: 43kg

Early life

(1994 to 2002)
He was born and raised on his father’s side of the house - which is in Taipei, Taiwan. His mum didn’t know how to speak Mandarin, and she was often clumsy at taking care of him. The doctors declared her unable to conceive, making Cal’s presence by her side a miraculous occurrence. She did everything possible so that her only son would lack nothing. Even with her challenges, she showered him with all his favourite treats. She held such a special bond with him. Because of that, he could have been a bit of a handful! However, having to watch his mother cry every time she was scolded by a father’s relative influenced him because he was raised in a conservative Asian home for the majority of his childhood.

While living in Taipei, Cal developed a noticeable outward deviation in his right eye, indicating exotropia. This drew unwanted attention to him, which heightened his anxiety. He was constantly in a panic, avoiding eye contact, and frequently outgrew his fringe to conceal it. His self-consciousness got worse when attending school, since he looked a lot different from the other kids. Blond hair, blue eyes, and pale skin were all from his mother’s genetics, plus his somewhat weird eye, making him look nothing like his father, who is Asian. His relatives disapproved of Cal, but despite everything, his father still loved him with his whole heart. Not being able to use Mandarin conversationally was the endpoint for his grandparents. They despised it when his mum taught him about English more than Mandarin. Cal knew about it and didn’t want to trouble his mum, so he preferred to communicate with everyone, presumably by hand signals.

(2002 to 2004)
The concerning signs of their son were noticeable; Cal’s parents immediately knew they had to take matters into their own hands. They bid their relatives goodbye and moved to Toronto, Canada. Cal spent half of his childhood in his house since his parents homeschooled him; they were worried their son was going to end up getting picked on for his odd behaviour. Therefore, Cal lacked age-appropriate friendships. He’d rather stay at home all day long with his mother’s side grandparents since they were gentle to him. They gave him English classes and some French instruction to improve his overall communication skills. His father then faced financial hardship; therefore, he required a stable job. They were living on his mother’s paycheck and their grandparents’ insurance. But then came a spark of light when his father finally found a job. The only problem is that it was in America, so they gathered everything and went there by car.

(2004 to 2010)
The family chose Chicago, Illinois as their final destination, not just because it is near Arkansas, where Cal’s father works, but also because it’s a pleasant place to settle. Cal went to the town’s local school, having hopes it would be better this time. The kids often made fun of him, except for a girl. Veronica Nguyen was her name. She lived next door and knew this place more than anyone. Cal didn’t like her at first glance, since she was so… odd. But things took a turn when both of their mothers socialised more, and with that, they hung out with each other more. She was his first-ever friend, the best friend.

Throughout his teens, he was being bullied by his entire school class. There was no particular reason for it. Some said it was because he was much smaller for the kids his age, or perhaps they labelled him as the odd one out, a lower class. He was continually being beaten up and harassed in different ways, such as pushing him into the girls’ changing room, locking him in the school supplies closet, etc. There was one major change in him when the bullies made him the centre of a cruel “prank” which they lured him behind the school and all took turns to hit Cal to the point he couldn’t breathe properly. Then, one of them slit his deltoideus; the cuts were so deep that it left him crumbling to the ground. When the fun ended, they all dumped him before Veronica discovered him. When returning home, Cal’s mum discovered heavy bruises and cuts all over his body; she demanded answers, but Cal refused. Because she couldn’t get the truth from her son, she reported the incident to the school administration, and ultimately, the entire class received blame. When his teacher confronted the class about the claim, Cal ran out of the room, fearing the worst. Unfortunately, one bully was the son of the man who funded the school, so they could only suspend them from going to school for a few days. But they hid it from Cal’s mum, so she still believed that the bullies got expelled. From then on, his torment got worse, but he kept quiet and lied to his mum.

His self-harming led his mother to seek help from numerous therapists, despite his repeated promises to stop. He only stopped cutting when both of his arms were covered with scars. He always wore a long-sleeved undershirt whenever he went outside because he didn’t want to cause more unwanted attention to his family.